This blog entry was first published on Co-Founder Michael McGuire’s blog HERE

18th September 2019.

The night so many aligning stars formulated their plan and guided me home.

It’s been a road full of more twists and turns than a Formula one calendar. As a bereaved Father it’s a journey I wish I had never had yet once you are strapped in, you face the experience head on. A roller coaster of infinity that you can’t get off, no matter how much you yearn to do so.

10 years ago was when my life was given the Reboot I didn’t want but I know has shocked me back to humanity. My Son Kyle may have been born asleep, however he has given me a renewed sense of purpose that was lacking in my previous life.

It’s a lonely journey sometimes. Crucially my co-pilot has been by my side the entire time. There have been testing moments along the way that as a family we have had to battle, my wife’s cancer at 26 being our toughest after losing Kyle.

We have gained some very special friends along the way. Sadly lost many too. Part of me died 10 years ago. I’m replaced by another version of my life. The choice was simple. Almost like a twisted sub plot from Star Wars. Be consumed by darkness and bitterness or see the light and hope “the force is with me”.

As a family we decided to “strike back”. To show the world we will not take anything lying down. And this was the base of some friendships developing that would come full circle a decade on. It also has cost me many friendships and for that I have no regrets.

Our 1st effort was a night for the wonderful Sands charity. Over the coming years we followed up with support for others including Tommy’s and Clic Sargent. The joy in raising awareness and some pennies gave a rush that cannot be accurately described. The feeling of giving a high 5 to every little Star in the sky to let them know we got this.

If you have a Dream, no matter what happens, hold onto it and never lose hope.

Dream? If i wasn’t on that bus I’d rather be on the road to tranquillity. An eescape from the cruel world that was holding me captive. One phone call asked the question. The follow ups answered and went to work.

Months of hard work. Long nights after work. Legal docs, emails. Branding, identity and many tears and smiles.

March 2019 Anam Cara Fasgadh offcially became a Scottish charity. With the aim of providing that free respite that fate never allowed me to go to. To strive to ensure others can be given space to grieve.

As I stared at the new found bank balance of Zero, i wonderd how in earth can we do this? The answer came on an emotional autumn evening in Edinburgh as Anam Cara Fasgadh launched in the Scottish Parliament in Edinburgh.

As soon as the Radio played Kyle’s song, the most beautiful Rainbow appeared in Glencoe as I knew we would be ok.

An evening containing every emotion possible. 10 years on from saying goodbye to Kyle, I was able to speak of him as I delivered a speech in The Scottish Parliament in front of his Mummy and Sister. A normal husband and Father making a dream cone true in the place that one yeat earlier had set the stars in alignment. One of the proudest moments of my life.

Never in a million years did I imagine this path. Being part of an exclusive club you cannot leave is how I describe being a bereaved parent. Now I am here, I’m devoted to making the world a kinder place in Kyle’s name.

To stand in our Parliament with several other Child Loss charities there to support us was humbling beyond belief. All of us now United with the goal of working together for bereaved families.

Not my words, but maybe too beautiful not to apply as It means a lot to me.

Maybe I can’t stop the Downpour, but I will always join you for a walk in the Rain.

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